Wednesday, January 22, 2020

What is the difference between hearing and listening?


What is the difference between hearing and listening?
Here are the dictionary and mine ..
HEAR – “perceive with the ear the sound made by (someone or something) “ .
I feel like you can hear the birds, the waves, the cars honking, someone talking, music playing, etc.
LISTEN – “ give one’s attention to a sound.” Yes, when you give attention, that is listening.
Over the weekend I was at a workshop, and we learned, had breakthroughs, heard and listened to a lot. An AHA moment for me was when we began to discuss Listening. Does one need to go to a workshop to understand listening? Yes, I think so 🙂
During the lunch break, I was talking to my husband and shared with him learnings from the morning.
I feel one can listen from your head ( mind ) and one can listen from the heart!
Do you know the difference?

I realized that often when I am listening, I am already in my mind preparing what I am going to say to the person. What advice I feel the person needs! What needs to be done ..etc.etc.
And, when I listen from my heart – I am listening. Taking in and understanding what the person is saying, feeling .. There truly is a big difference. To listen from your heart is when You are totally present and right there for the person. You are in the ‘ Now ‘
“Most people do not listen with the intent to understand; they listen with the intent to reply.” Stephen R. Covey
As I sat back and thought about it I actually tried to honestly contemplate – How much was I truly listening and how much did I hear?
There are many benefits of listening.
Listening creates better relationships because it shows the other person that we are paying attention to them, their feelings, their thoughts, where they are and what is really happening.
It makes you more patient. It helps you build trust among everyone around You. It makes you more approachable .. more compassionate too.
The one thing I want to share is the few things we can do to listen better.
Look at the person .. look at their eyes. What are they saying? Don’t look at your phone and read your messages ( or this blog ) while someone is trying to talk to You.
Don’t judge the person, let them feel and share their feelings. Be open and attentive to them.
Please do not try and find solutions for them while they are talking. Sometimes people just want to share and not be given solutions. Unless asked for, I would suggest, Please do not give any advice… just an empathetic ear.
“Sometimes all a person wants is an empathetic ear; all he or she needs is to talk it out. Just offering a listening ear and an understanding heart for his or her suffering can be a big comfort.”
―Roy T. Bennett
So here I am ..offering You an empathetic ear.
What would You like to share?

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